B.I.D

I made a list of all the things I
Want to do before I die, because
Mortality is just a social construct
And we’re just waves in a never ending
Ocean, devoting the hours to walking the
Lines and feeling rebellious when we don’t.
I made a list starting with skydiving because
Fuck gravity. That’s why. I’m hurtling reasons

At the sun daring it to sear my wings and start
A fire only my heart and soul can rival, I wrote
‘skipping stones and skipping out’ because
Concentration should only be allowed in small
Amounts and if we were able to float freely with
Mind and thought I’m convinced we would be
Better people, I climbed church steeples to shout
At God, asking him if he is ready for my arrival,

To have the red carpet glossed with flowers and
Wine, and a screen to show my life line caught in
The hands of time, feeble and calculated, I burned
Pictures to free spirits and donated every morsel I
Had, starving people need more than food and
Imagination is in short supply these days, my mind
A hamster wheel stuck on auto pilot I drink myself
Senseless and allow serenity to catch my unusual high

Before the fall, the dulcet tones of a telephone and the
Call that marks the beginning of my time upstairs, playing
In old children’s rooms recreating stop motions of the
Past where Barbie’s shoe size and Action Man’s heroics
Were the only things that mattered, and stuffed animals
Had voices and individuality before they were locked in
Plastic bags the terrible end to Toy Story they never
Really explained, before the weights were tied around

My ankles and I sit here, under the slipping moonlight
With a blank canvas and a single 50 cents pen writing
Down a list of things to do before I die because this whole
Concept of, being alive, doesn’t fit in my hamster wheel anymore.

 

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